How to Have Sex in the Office and Not Get Caught. Whatever your reason for getting it
on in the workplace – and, trust us, we don't want to know – make sure it stays
between you and your amour. You will need Easy-to-remove clothes A comfortable spot
and wet wipes. Step 1. Make sure you know the location of all office security cameras
so your little romp isn't caught on tape. Surveillance equipment is typically placed
near entry and exit points and in rooms than contain merchandise or other valuables. But
employers have been known to put cameras in employees’ private offices. It’s illegal
to put cameras in restrooms, so that’s usually a safe place. Step 2. Dress for sex-cess,
meaning clothes that go on and off quickly and don't wrinkle easily. Going commando saves
a lot of time. Ladies, remove your lipstick so your partner doesn't become a marked man.
Step 3. Choose an out-of-the way location that doesn't get much foot traffic. A closet
with a locked door is an excellent option. Step 4. If one of you has an office, record
yourselves having a fake conference call, then play the recording from behind closed
doors; sounds of an important meeting will make co-workers think twice before barging
in. Lean a chair under the office doorknob to thwart surprise visitors; you can later
claim the door was jammed if anyone asks. Step 5. Don't return to your desk without
freshening up. Be sure to check your clothes for dead giveaways like inside-out blouses
and missed buttons. Step 6. Play it safe by waiting until everyone leaves work for the
night. Just make sure you know the cleaning staff’s routine and schedule before you
pick a time and place or you’ll experience a whole different kind of coitus interruptus.
Step 7. If you _are_ caught, say a simple "I'm sorry," and get back to work. Attempting
to explain or justify can only make matters worse. Did you know Nineteen percent of men
and eight percent of women say they've had sex at their workplace, according to one survey.